To Date or Not to Date?
Chad and I have been mulling over what our true convictions are, and what our expectations will be in regards to dating as our daughters move toward the teen years.
In encouraging Coplea to be a part of a small group Bible Study for 7th and 8th grade FSMers, we inadvertantly brought the question to the immediate forefront. The leadership didn't look quite closely enough in choosing the study material for all of FSM (the same book for 11-18 year-olds this time around). As it turns out, Chad contacted the author and learned that the title was actually intended for 18-24 year-olds, which would explain the steamy stories and true-to-life experiences of young adults shared in the opening chapters. A little too much talk of "erotic" feelings and promiscuity for our young 7th grader. We talked through it with her, and also took our concerns to the Bible Study leader, who echoed the feelings after the first meeting. The upcoming meetings should be focused more on what Scripture says about giving our hearts to our one true Prince. . . should be an interesting few weeks as we continue the conversation with our blossoming young lady.
Next weekend is also the planned-for Passport to Purity weekend for me and Coplea. . . so we're all things pre-teen around here right now.
This evening at the neighborhood pool, I chatted for over an hour with Walter and Carole Tillman about what they've observed in their 8 children (6 of whom are Coplea's age and older). Their take is to encourage group outings and allow one-on-one "dates" only when in the context of a group event (e.g., homeschool "prom"). Walter's reasoning really resonated with me, so I had to capture it here.
In Scripture, there are really only two primary male-female relationships addressed. That of the man and woman who are betrothed/married, and that of the brother and sister. Unless a man is prepared to marry a young woman (which clearly is not the case with anyone under the age of at least 20 in this day and age!), there is no other Biblical model than the brother-sister relationship. As Walter talks with potential suitors for his older girls (20 and 18), he reminds them of this and sets the expectation that they would treat her not as a wife, but as a sister in Christ.
Great food for thought. . . .
In encouraging Coplea to be a part of a small group Bible Study for 7th and 8th grade FSMers, we inadvertantly brought the question to the immediate forefront. The leadership didn't look quite closely enough in choosing the study material for all of FSM (the same book for 11-18 year-olds this time around). As it turns out, Chad contacted the author and learned that the title was actually intended for 18-24 year-olds, which would explain the steamy stories and true-to-life experiences of young adults shared in the opening chapters. A little too much talk of "erotic" feelings and promiscuity for our young 7th grader. We talked through it with her, and also took our concerns to the Bible Study leader, who echoed the feelings after the first meeting. The upcoming meetings should be focused more on what Scripture says about giving our hearts to our one true Prince. . . should be an interesting few weeks as we continue the conversation with our blossoming young lady.
Next weekend is also the planned-for Passport to Purity weekend for me and Coplea. . . so we're all things pre-teen around here right now.
This evening at the neighborhood pool, I chatted for over an hour with Walter and Carole Tillman about what they've observed in their 8 children (6 of whom are Coplea's age and older). Their take is to encourage group outings and allow one-on-one "dates" only when in the context of a group event (e.g., homeschool "prom"). Walter's reasoning really resonated with me, so I had to capture it here.
In Scripture, there are really only two primary male-female relationships addressed. That of the man and woman who are betrothed/married, and that of the brother and sister. Unless a man is prepared to marry a young woman (which clearly is not the case with anyone under the age of at least 20 in this day and age!), there is no other Biblical model than the brother-sister relationship. As Walter talks with potential suitors for his older girls (20 and 18), he reminds them of this and sets the expectation that they would treat her not as a wife, but as a sister in Christ.
Great food for thought. . . .
posted by MyFairLadies at
7:53 PM
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